Feline Dreams

Another dream the night before last.

My old black cat came to visit me. Brutus; 17 pounds of pure love who followed me around faithfully, slept wrapped around my head at night, and who in his prime resembled a small panther himself. Huge heart, claws, and a huge coward. Sometimes. Hearing an odd noise outside one day I walked out to find him gripping another cat, hugging it almost with both thick forearms, teeth to it's throat with his hind claws pressing against it's belly and moaning very quietly into the others jugular, which I interpreted as "Please don't make me kill you, I just want you to go away, alright?" When I said "Brutus?" he released him. The cat never came back.

In my dream I turned on my side in bed and Roo was sitting next to me looking solemnly down at me purring in that low rumble of his. His face was bloody. He wasn't hurt though. What did this mean? Anything?

After waking yesterday from my Noble Brutus's visit I noticed that my foot which had been oddly troubling me for a few days, was swollen and sore ........ ????????????? ................ what the .....? Today I went to an Urgent Care Clinic and had it Xrayed and examined. Sprained. In two places.

The only time, the ONLY time I could've possibly damaged it was last week when I tripped on the stage...............You notice I said on the stage, not onstage? That's because I tripped ON the stage.

How does one do this you ask? How does one trip on a totally flat surface with no swellings, bumps, humps, hills, warts, bubbles, pimples, knobs, nodules, or projections of any size or kind? Ahhhhhhhh.........it takes special skill, a certain amount of ingenuity and low animal cunning. This is how Grasshopper: One trips on the EDGE of the flat surface....... Clever, no?

Last week I was getting ready for my Bishop of Ely entrance from the upstage left center (my left not yours, silly!) stairs which lead from the backstage area 12 or so feet below the back of the stage surface. In both left and right hand I had handfuls of the two robes I was wearing hitched up high so I didn't step on those floor length garments and go face first into the risers; I got my left foot onto the stage and as I was stepping up with my right, my toes caught the edge and I stumbled forward taking a huge step to get my foot under my forward moving body, came down hard on my right foot and kept on going (I had an entrance some seconds away) to my position behind a portion of the scenery to wait for my Cue-light. I didn't think a thing of it, didn't report it as an accident because I didn't think I'd hurt myself. Oh hell. I'm feeling inordinately clumsy.

So I'm wearing an air cast now, icing my foot and admiring my new cane; reading the stickers on it. Do me a favor? Put on your best Monster Truck Rally voice--the ones you hear advertised on the radio and telly. Ready? Now say this: "And Here Comes Carpenter, using his brand new All Aluminum McKesson Performance Cane built by Sunmark!! A regular cane but oh this baby's got some features!! Oh, Yeeeehhh!!!! Look at those adjustable buttons!!! Whaaaat a hand grip!! And that tip is outta siiiiiight!!!!"

Thank you. I feel better now knowing some of you probably actually did this.

My current black kitty, The Queen Of All She Surveys, She Who Must Be Obeyed, my little plump one, my Little Pumpkin of Love sits with me as I ice my damn ankle. We've always had at lest one black cat since about 1979--it's become a Tradition. She is the latest addition to a string of great cats and may be my favorite ever. A one of a kind. She and Brutus were great friends; we actually got her out of the back of a Richmond Police squad car--she looked very arresting..............


Can I have a rim shot please!?!